Quick update for this last month.
On April 2nd I was taken from campus to the QEII hospital with a neurological event. It was a bit special. I couldn’t write. Nothing I wrote down was actually what I was trying to write. I couldn’t think enough to make decisions; I had a MASSIVE headache and was shaking. My right arm was shaking pretty violently. I spent 7 hours in the acute care unit in the emergency department had a brain scan and bloods done. Brain scan was fine (YAY). I was allowed to go home after they finished the last bag of medication (4 hours for one bag).
I was then unable to attend University for a few days. I missed an exam and had to have it deferred. When I did return I received a ruling that I would no longer be able to attend chemistry labs as I was perceived to be an OHS risk. I was still quite unwell when I returned. I sat the original exam and bombed out pretty spectacularly in spite of application for special circumstances. I had to defer a different exam because I missed three crucial lectures.
I went to see my GP who called in sick. I ended up seeing another doctor who told me that I really should have taken all that til 17th off Uni. So it has been a bit crappy. I’ve had a headache since my trip to the hospital which varies in intensity. No one seems to know exactly what happened. It has been written up as “Atypical Migraine”, medical speak for ‘we have no idea but it hurt a lot’.
I have decided to drop chemistry til next year. I will have more time to work with disability services to make better arrangements for my labs; it will take some of the stress off. Taking four subjects this semester was overambitious.
I have continued with my macro project. I hit a pretty low point and was struggling to find a reason to pick up the camera at all. I gave myself a good solid boot in the backside and reminded myself that if I change my outlook and see all the things I HAVE achieved and the absolute bonuses of my life at this point instead of wading in the mire of self-doubt and misery, those things are really pretty awesome by comparison. I still have my down days and some of those days I will cycle really quickly between up and really down, but I am human just like everyone else.
I am currently on mid semester break and taking advantage of the time off. I am also allowing myself to have more pyjama days to try and drop some of that stress off.
I hope you are all well, as happy as you can be and at the very least making it through okay ♥